all these things that i've done
year-end ruminations
J and I went on our first international trip together this past spring. Of all the places to choose from, we both had our hearts set on Ireland.
Like most things, the anticipation was longer than the trip itself. I’ve spent the remainder of 2023 in disbelief that I was there, despite what my camera roll suggests. Our first day in Dublin, I was determined to postpone my jet lag. After closely following our itinerary of art museum and bookstore browsing, J accepted defeat and trekked back to our hotel.
At first, I was angry—this trip was a huge milestone in our relationship, and how could he want to sleep when we were in a place we had dreamed of visiting for so long? Our togetherness was such a focal point for most of our travel decisions that I didn’t immediately realize the underlying blessing of our foiled afternoon—I was alone in a new city, in another country.
So I walked. I got lost and made the same turns multiple times, but I took my time. I browsed Zara and & Other Stories and felt nauseous at the prospect of buying something. My phone was on 20% and I still had a mile and a half walk to our hotel, which was near a canal at the edge of the city. I found a park, St. Stephen’s Green, and followed a path. I admired strangers sitting on benches and students in clusters on the lawn with their backpacks. The intermittent patches of grey and blue in the sky reminded me of home—Cleveland always seems to change its mind about the kind of day it wants to have.
Despite all of the things that could have gone wrong, they didn’t. I was reluctant to go back to the hotel. Time stops for no one, yet when I find myself in moments similar to what I had in Dublin, I want to remain firmly rooted in the present.
I still feel the wind on my face.
I’ve never been one to set a numeric reading goal for myself each year—I know that when I want to read something, I’ll do it. I don’t want a book to be thought of as a marker to whatever finish line I’ve mentally constructed—which is why it can take me days or weeks to finish something. (Surely this can’t be the same brain that earned me an English degree, or a Frisbee to the face while devouring the historical American Girl doll books in summer camp).
Anyway, I digress. Throughout this year I couldn’t help but pick up on the accessorization of books or the act of reading in general—which I did fall victim to. I purchased a reading journal from Papier because I’ll always be an analog girl at heart, and a lifelong sucker for stationery. On another note, I did make an honest effort on Fable to organize my chaotic 2023 mental library, between ARCs on NetGalley, books I read entirely on my phone, and physical books.
I read 17 books this year, the majority of which being literary fiction—according to my Fable “reading wrap,” this genre is my love language. I started using NetGalley this year, which I find to be quite enjoyable in terms of finding debut authors and new work to immerse myself in, and keeping up with new releases of writers I’m familiar with.
A Case of the Chronically Online: Two of the books I read this year featured Very Online female protagonists—Social Engagement by Avery Carpenter Forrey and Worry by Alexandra Tanner (the latter is being released 3/26/24). Usually I get distracted by heavy use of social media and Internet jargon in literary work, but for both of these books, it worked well. Social Engagement and Worry both have whip-smart, dry narrators but each are in entirely different phases of their lives—Social Engagement pokes fun at Millennial wedding culture and Worry chronicles a codependent sibling relationship.
The Rise of the Office Novel: The Best of Everything by Rona Jaffe was reissued by Penguin Classics this year for its 65th anniversary. Published in 1958, The Best of Everything follows three women who work in the secretarial pool of a New York City publishing office (think the aesthetics and language of Mad Men meshed with the frankness of Sex and the City). I think this novel held up well when it comes to women’s desires in and out of the office, and paved the way for books that tell stories of women’s experiences with late-stage capitalism (Ripe by Sarah Rose Etter, which was released earlier this year, is set in present-day Silicon Valley).
Family Ties: “To be loved by your father is to be loved by God.” Daughter by Claudia Dey took me a month and a half (!!) to finish this year, but I’m really glad I took my time with it. It was a heavy but necessary read for me personally, as I’m fascinated by stories of adults examining the emotional complexities of their parental relationships. The author, Claudia Dey, is a playwright, and the prose in Daughter coincides with that.
“Freedom comes from preparation.” Sarah Jessica Parker said this in a New Yorker profile from June (written by the amazing Rachel Syme). It would be egregious of me to get this phrase tattooed, so it has a place on my inspiration board in my office instead.
Pinterest Predicts 2024: This year marked the boom of Clean Girl, Vanilla Girl, Tomato Girl, Coastal Granddaughter, and Coastal Cowgirl identity attributes, but Pinterest rocked my world with the prediction of 2024’s Eclectic Grandpa. “Think retro streetwear, chic cardigans and customised clothing.”
Some noteworthy moments from this year:
Getting vertigo at the Eras Tour: Sometimes it is more so about the journey rather than the destination. While fighting to the death on Ticketmaster for Row KK at Acrisure Stadium last November, it did not occur to me how high up that would be. With a White Claw and water bottle tucked under my arm and one hand balancing a tray of $17 chicken tenders, I climbed the hundreds of concrete steps wearing heels (LOL). My entire body felt hollow by the time I got to my seat.
Seeing the Cliffs of Moher: Booking an all-day bus tour on TripAdvisor was worth it. I felt like I was living inside of a postcard.
Hearing “Pictures of You” live: It was a great year for concerts. The Cure came to Cleveland and played a full set through a torrential downpour, and J and I got to hear Robert Smith croon “our” song. We also traveled to Detroit to see Phoenix—singing along to “Lisztomania” was a big deal for this grown-up Tumblr teen.
Meeting online creators: I met Dakota in New York over the summer, and Chloe tagged along. Still starstruck!!!
Letting it linger: Arbela and I got dressed up to go to a party, only to leave to get martinis and blast “Linger” with the windows down on the way to Crumbl afterward.
Book swapping: In August, I hosted a novel enrichment book swap at a local park and I can’t wait to host another one.
Starting a writing group: Very thankful for my writerly women group and all of my friendships, old and new.
Lastly: A special shoutout to Anthem Blue Cross Blue Shield, for picking up my birthday hospital tab.
I’m excited for 2024 and all of the people, places, and things it will lead me to—including the novel enrichment book club! Be sure to follow along on Instagram for updates and the first pick announcement.
This has been one of the busiest years of my life. I’m so glad to be ending it on a high note, and with you!
Signing off,
Loved this, and loved the SJP profile you linked